I feel old

I can not believe I have a child going to HIGH SCHOOL next year. In his mind he is "so over" middle school. The year might as well be over. He even asked if he could skip school on Friday because the girls were all taking the day off to get "made-up". Last night was their 8th grade field trip, 8th grade prom, or 8th grade semi-formal. Call it whatever you like....I'll just call it an eye opener for me. I stood on the dock of the Cape Fear River last night at 10 pm, with my loving husband beside me, and watched as my son and a whole gaggle of giggly girls (he is always surrounded...its a family joke) walked down the dock of the Heneritta III looking like people I didn't even know.

When did my son get big enough to shop for a suit in the men's department? When did he get bold enough to hold a girls hand in public? Where was I when he made these huge jumps in his life?

I knew 2 years ago when he shot up 6 inches over the summer that he was growing up. It scared me when I had to look slightly up to see into his eyes. But that feeling is nothing compared to the fear I have of him growing up faster (INSIDE) than I can handle now. My son is turning into a young man. I sit here with tears in my eyes and wonder to myself when did all of this happen. If the last 14 years of is life seem like a blur to me now, how fast are the next 4 going to go by? In 4 years my son will (hopefully for him NOT me) be leaving to attend college. How will I handle that? I can't even get past the 8th grade prom with out bawling like a baby.

My husband , being the confronting man he is, just laughs at me and says "It is what you wanted". I thought about that this morning and he was right (this time). I want to raise him to be a good "MAN". I want to see him grow up and accomplish all the goals he sets for himself. I want to someday have a house full of grandchildren. In order for all of this to have I have to let him GROW UP.

But speaking from the woman that gave birth to him. It is just so hard to watch. I just thank God that he gave me my children everyday!!!